The New Shinra Equal Opportunity Program
by talinsquall
Summary: Reno's still Reno, even in a dress. Cloud's a hero, who's also a possessive, stalking psycho. Reno/Cloud. Some Rufus/Tseng,in beginning. Slight Rude/Tifa. Yaoi, Mpreg, Cursing, Lemons, Sex Changes, Cross-Dressing. 2nd Revision 4/16-17/09


A/N: This is what happens when I don't get any sleep. Originally published 10/30/08. Final Revision 11/11/10 (This will always be one of my personal faves of all time.)

Fandom: Final Fantasy 7

Summary: Reno is still Reno, even in a dress… especially in a dress. Cloud's a hero, who just happens to be a possessive, stalking psycho.

Pairings: Mostly Reno/Cloud, Rufus/Tseng in beginning, slight Rude/Tifa (about as het as I'll ever get)

Warnings: Yaoi, MPREG, Cursing, Shinra-Endorsed Semi Sex Change (Blame the Mako), Reno being Reno, Cross-Dressing, Possessive, Crazy Cloud, SEX

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this fan fiction.

**The New Shinra Equal Opportunity Program**

XXX

The New Shinra Equal Opportunity Program began with the doctor's annual post-checkup to the President's suite.

To Rufus's utter delight, after being cured of the Geostigma, he had been given a clean bill of health. He had one niggling problem. The illness had rendered him sterile.

Being the last of the Shinra, Rufus, of course, could not let this stand. At his convenient disposal, he had everything he could possibly need to correct this biological setback. He had scientists, he had money, and he had the ultimate Fix-It-All, Mako.

What had been considered a horrendous side-effect for the use of Mako, in the past, became a Godsend to a frantic President. The increased usage of Mako, at certain percentages, at certain times, and with increasing dosages would endow the user with a full set of female reproductive organs, complete with breasts.

How did this come about? Who knows? Even though the scientists should have. Mako had been used for everything under the sun. A person used the source and the chemical did its job. End of story.

Within the year, Rufus Shinra took his seat back on the Shinra heir and spare bus. While he would not be the father of the next Shinra generation, he could certainly fill the mother's role. He only had to choose the lucky man to be the father of the future Shinras and get down to baby-making.

One little difficulty surfaced to darken Rufus's sunny plans. A list would be made of potential daddies, and a week or so later, the men would all be found dead.

At first, this did not deter Rufus. People died all the time, especially when the person had been deemed a potential suitor for a Shinra. The danger of death came with the job.

To Rufus's irritation, this nuisance happened three more times. Not only did this shorten the playing field, the setback also screwed up his family planning schedule.

Rufus should have been through his second trimester by now with his heir. Instead, he sat stuck again at the office looking through file upon odious file for his future baby's daddy. This would not do.

Unlike his Thank-be-to-the-Gods-dead father, Rufus could figure things out for himself. This problem took a little more deduction than usual.

Hmmm.

Who had access to Rufus's little hand-written lists? The list was always kept in his breast pocket, right next to his heart, after writing the names down. Not for romantic reasons, he just had his other pockets full of shotgun shells.

Rufus perused the files. Who got the information and delivered the files to him each time he had to make another list of potential murder victims?

Rufus's slow gaze slid to the right where a certain Wutaian kept constant quiet vigil, except for when he had been hurt in that unfortunate Remnants fiasco. "Ohhhh, Tsenggg."

An alert Tseng stepped forward, turning sharply to the left, ready to receive his employer's bidding. "Yes, sir?"

Rufus turned in his chair. For the first time, in a very long while, he checked out his right-hand man.

Well, Tseng had certainly filled out since the pair had first started out together. The added muscle looked good on him. Physically fit, sound teeth, extremely well-kept hair. Hmmm, not a bad looking ass either. "Sir, can I help you with anything?"

Smirking, Rufus pondered how to bring the subject up without accusing his main bodyguard of mass murder. He pondered if Tseng was even gay. He pondered how their children would look with their mixed genes.

Why in the world did he bother pondering?

Rufus Shinra wanted his babies and he wanted them now. He didn't care if Tseng killed over two hundred men by himself, for them to get to this point. The act was probably some bizarre Turk courtship ritual anyway, unknown to him, like a secret handshake. "Tseng, if I made up another list of candidates. What would you think the probability would be of them being killed within the week?"

Gazing at his future husband's countenance, Rufus hoped Tseng would give something away.

However, Tseng had not become head of the Turks for nothing. His face showed no tell-tale emotion whatsoever. "Who can say, sir? Death comes for us all, eventually."

Rufus pouted and didn't bother to hide it.

A master player in the game of intrigue, Tseng would never give easy answers even to Rufus.

Well! Rufus thought. At least he's on my side.

Rufus hoped the children wouldn't take after Tseng in the secrets department. The oncoming teenage years would be hell on earth. "Tseng, what would you say if I told you I'm ovulating right now and wanted you to be the father of my children?"

Once again failing to give anything away, Tseng jumped for joy inside. "I would say you have made fifty men ecstatically happy to be alive for another week."

Laughing, Rufus pulled Tseng down for a rough kiss. "Well then, Daddy. Let's get started."

When Rufus's son was born nine months later, healthy and hearty, he decided to be charitable, by releasing all the information and scientific know-how which had helped in his son's creation to the mass public.

So the poor riff-raff who had been afflicted, like Rufus, could be blessed with the gift of a child.

The donation had also been a huge tax write-off, but the public didn't need to know that.

Hence The New Shinra Equal Opportunity Program came into being.

XXX

"This is bullshit! I ain't sterile, yo!"

The head spokesperson, of the newly established NSEOP, gave a huge sigh, repeating what she had told this Reno Turk person three times already. "Sir, it is not my decision, who gets picked from each department to be enlisted in this program. It so happens your team is the only one not in the field at this time."

"Well, there's two of us! What's wrong with usin' Rude as ya baby-maker, yo?"

Standing at ease, next to his partner, Rude noticeably flinched.

"Sorry, Partner. But I got rights too, yo!"

The spokesperson looked askance and somewhat ill at the prospect. "The head scientists had been given both of your files. On perusal, the team decided that you, and only you, Reno, would be a viable subject."

She failed to add, that at first glance, the main scientist threw Rude's file back into her face. He declared, to make Rude pregnant, would be going against all that was good and holy.

"I ain't even gay!"

Confused for a moment, the spokesperson rechecked the file held in her grasp."Sir, it states right here in your official files your sexual affiliation is homosexual. This came direct from the Turk home office."

"The fuck?"

"Yes, sir. For reference, the office also included official photographs."

Tearing the file out of the spokesperson's hands, Reno rummaged through the papers and attached photos. "Fuckin' Tseng! How the hell would he feel if I took pictures of him gettin' it on with Rufus, yo?"

A discreet Rude leaned over. "He would shoot you between the eyes before you raised the camera."

Reno looked up with a blank gaze. "Oh yeah… Still ain't right, yo!"

The spokesperson snatched the file back from Reno, then made sure all the papers lay intact. "For the last time, sir! If you refuse to be the sole Turk enlistee for your department, you will be removed from your post and stripped of your pension."

Fisting hands on hips, Reno wrinkled his forehead in distress, trying to focus on the situation. "That include the medical insurance?"

Rude stepped back a little in case Reno's head exploded.

The spokesperson nodded her head up and down. "Yes, sir. You would lose all medical, dental, and optical insurance; along with your pension."

Crossing thin arms in front of his chest, Reno blew air through pursed lips. "Well, fuck that! Y'okay. Where do I sign up to get my free boobs, yo?"

The spokesperson's eyes widened with the disbelief this creature could ever have been employed by Shinra. "You are to arrive in the main science lab, located in the new NSEOP headquarters, at 9 am sharp tomorrow morning. No food or liquids, besides water, after midnight."

Nodding his head fast, Reno looked away in disgust.

The spokesperson made a quick exit.

Rude moved closer to his partner. "It won't be so bad, Partner. You said you always wanted kids ever since your Grandma died."

Reno shrugged. He then looked back to Rude. Eyes wide with dismay. "AWWW FUUUCK!"

Rude cased their location, looking for anything suspicious. "Reno, what's wrong?"

Stamping his foot in frustration, Reno flung his arms out. "WHERE THE FUCK IS THE NSEOP HEADQUARTERS, YO?"

Shaking his head, Rude took his partner by the arm and led him out to the car.

XXX

Rude and Reno arrived, with a screech of brakes, in front of the Seventh Heaven.

"You comin'?" Rude tilted his head in the direction of the open doorway.

"Yeeeeaaaah. Che! Be the last time I'll be drinking booze for awhile, yo."

"I think you can still drink alcohol, until right before you get pregnant. I even heard, after a certain time, you can have a little red wine now and then."

"Nothin' doin'! My babies are gonna live the clean life, right from the beginnin'! Just like Grandma wanted for me back then, yo!"

Rude shook his head. "Haven't even gone through the treatments yet and you're already thinking like a mom."

Reno looked down towards his lap. His white-knuckled hands twisting around the Electro-Mag rod. "Baby girl's gonna be named after her. That's for damn sure. Do her Great-Grandma proud, yo."

"How do you know you'll even have a girl?"

Reno glared up with a fierce look in his eye. "I'll keep havin' em til' she shows up, yo!"

Rude held up gloved hands in surrender. "Whatever you say, Partner. Let's get a drink."

XXX

Rude entered the Seventh Heaven Bar with a quick wave hello to the owner, Tifa.

A slouching silent Reno followed behind.

After what Rufus referred to as "that horrid Remnants fiasco," the Turks, along with their former enemies from AVALANCHE, became, if not good friends, at least pleasant acquaintances.

In fact, since Tifa had given up on Cloud Strife, Reno had caught Rude rehearsing various versions of a marriage proposal during their free time.

"What'll ya have? The same?" Tifa inquired, with a wink and a smile.

Reno shot a wink and a smile right back at her. "Sure thing, and keep 'em comin', yo."

After pouring a draft for Rude, Tifa got out the shot glass for Reno, placing a full bottle with stopper right next to it.

Raising eyebrows in surprise, Reno glanced over to his partner, only to spy mutual googly-eyes between Rude and Tifa.

With a sigh, Reno returned his gaze to the sad empty shot glass and decided to rectify the situation quickly.

Two hours, and many shots later, Reno felt no pain. In fact, he felt sort of giddy. Talking to the spokesperson earlier, the whole situation had rubbed him the wrong way. Now with the time to relax and think things through, he found this new assignment a blessing in disguise.

Reno wanted to have kids. He didn't think, though, being gay and being Reno, the miracle would ever happen for him.

Reno snorted into the shot glass, before pouring the liquid down his throat. Who in their right minds would let him adopt a kid?

Turks weren't known for stable home lives or even living long enough to have permanent homes.

By being enlisted in the program, Reno could have both. Receiving treatments for the next three months, he would then be expected to get pregnant. All the testing would be funded by New Shinra and analyzed for future NSEOP research.

For representing the Turk division, all of Reno's children born through the program would have free tuition all the way through college with the option of joining New Shinra later on.

Basically, Reno's job would be to give birth to the children and be a good Mom.

Reno looked across the way to his reflection in the bar mirror. With an impartial gaze, he stared at the face glaring back at him. He looked like his mother. Didn't stop her from beating him, though. Yep. All his fault the old man left. Nope, nothing to do with her boozing and sleeping around. The sole thing which saved him in the end had been his Grandma. If not for her, he would have died in the gutter a long time before he ever got to Shinra.

"Hey, Partner?"

Rolling sluggish eyes over to an amused Rude, Reno smiled. "What, Partner?"

"Can I tell Tifa the good news?"

Reno rolled sleepy eyes back down to his empty shot glass. "Hell, Rude. Ya gonna tell her anyway. 'Sides she could probably help, seein' she's all earth mother, yo."

Keeping his eyes trained on the shot glass, Reno heard Rude tell Tifa all that had transpired. When Rude got to the baby part, Tifa did a little hopping motion, clapping her hands together.

Reno sniggered. Yeah. Babies always seemed to be good news.

Running over, Tifa gave Reno a big hug.

Reno wondered if his breasts would get that big with the treatments. He shook his head. Probably not. Boobs like that came from the Gods.

"But Reno," Tifa motioned him to lean over so she could whisper in his ear. "Who's going to be the daddy?"

Reno wrinkled his forehead in consternation. Daddy? Well, fuck. Forgot about that. Can't be a mommy, without a daddy, to make the baby with.

The NSEOP had been adamant that the enlistee choose who the father would be. The organization stated this to be a personal issue.

Reno believed the scientists didn't want to take responsibility if the guy turned out to be a fuck-up.

Resting his head against the bar, Reno felt way too tired, and way too drunk, to choose a daddy now. Hell, maybe he'd ask his Grandma. He yelled out loud to Rude and Tifa's confusion. "Hey Grandma! Who's gonna be the daddy of our baby girl?"

"Someone having a baby?"

Flinching, Reno looked up into the reflecting mirror across the way, straight into the Mako-blue eyes of Cloud Strife. "Yeah, you could say that, yo."

XXX

_**Three months later…**_

"Hey Rude! Get a look at my new boobs, yo!"

Unfazed by anything his partner could or would do anymore, Rude turned in the driver's seat. Lowering his shades, he gazed at the naked chest presented to him. "Nice pair."

Reno tugged the shirt back over his chest."Yeah, slow-goin' for awhile. 'Bout to raise a ruckus, but I looked down this morning', and I guess they popped out while I was sleepin, yo."

Pushing the shades back up, Rude started the car. "Partner, now that you have them...Shouldn't you put on a bra?"

Reno snorted. "Nah, tried one on earlier. The fucker's uncomfortable as hell. Besides, I figure my babies need easy access, yo."

"So you're going to breastfeed?" Rude glanced over to Reno. Bald forehead wrinkling at the thought.

"For suuurre, Partner! Doc told me, from the beginnin,' that's the only way my babies will get certain stuff'll keep 'em healthy." With a frown, Reno remembered growing up and seeing lots of the kids die because of simple neglect from their parents. "Can't have 'em sick on accounta me, yo."

"Reno, you worry too much. Your babies will be fine. With you being in the program, they'll have the best medical care possible. Shinra's finest." Rude stated with a firm nod.

"Yeah, better too much worryin', then not enough, yo." Reno looked out the car window at the passing scenery.

Rude thought long and hard before bringing up the next subject. "You still set on Strife?"

"Aw for fuck sake's, Rude! Thought we was done talkin' bout this, yo!" Groaning, Reno lowered his forehead against the car window.

"Tifa's right. She should know, being she grew up, and did all that traveling with him. Strife's not right in the head. He could go all nutty again, hurting you, and the babies too."

Rearing back, Reno glared at Rude. "Tifa should mind her own! I can take care of myself. First Class SOLDIER or not, nobody's hurtin' my babies, while I'm livin'!"

"Yeah. What if he decides to leave, like he always does, and takes the babies with him? Tifa said he has a mean, possessive streak about what he considers his."

Squinting at the thought, Reno snarled right back. "Rude, I ain't a Turk for nothin'. Tifa just don't know how to keep Strife in line. 'Course, she didn't know he was gay, too. Don't worry 'bout me, Partner. If Strife even thinks about leavin,' and takin' my babies away from me, you worry about him, yo."

XXX

Tifa stood waiting in the doorway of Seventh Heaven when Rude and Reno drove up. She waved with a big smile. "Hey guys. Reno, I got the stuff you wanted."

Ocean-blue eyes lighting up, Reno slid over the hood of the car to stand in front of her. "Right color and everythin'?"

"Yep. Cloud's out making deliveries for another hour at least."

"Cool!" Reno turned back to Rude, who stood frowning, and shaking his head. He tipped his Electro-Mag rod to his forehead in salute. "Don't worry, Partner. Find a seat in the bar and enjoy the show. Today, I'm gonna land my baby's daddy."

XXX

Reno followed Tifa up to Marlene and Denzel's room. "Tifa, can you help me with the gear? Don't really have a Turk trainin' class for this, yo."

Tifa had laid everything out on Marlene's bed. She raised her eyebrows in surprise. "You sure?"

Looking away, Reno snickered. "Actually, they do. Sorta skipped it, yo."

Smiling, Tifa handed Reno a sleeveless, halter sun dress of a bluish-green color which matched his eyes.

When Reno put the dress on, the hem came to a little above his knee.

Tifa turned back around when Reno cleared his throat. "Oh, Reno! You look beautiful!"

Reno smiled back with little confidence.

After the treatments had taken effect, the NSEOP scientists proclaimed Reno's transformation a success. To begin with, Reno's form had been thin and gangly, so the new, feminine curves of breast and hip, filled him out just right. He had never worried about excess body hair. The treatments giving his skin a light glow.

Reno had let the sides, and the top of his hair, grow out these last three months so he would look more feminine. Facial tattoos, which should have looked odd, enhanced his cheekbones and the slant of his eyes, giving his face an exotic look.

In fact, except for his Adam's apple, Reno looked like a woman. An extremely beautiful woman, at that.

Because Reno couldn't wear high heels without falling down, Tifa bought him golden, flat sandals to wear on his long, thin feet. To showcase the beauty of his arms, she let him borrow her gold slave bracelets, which she fastened on his upper arms herself.

"Oh! Your breasts finally came!" Tifa laughed, clapping her hands together.

"Yeah. Ain't like yours though." Reno looked down at his chest, ruefully.

"Oh pooh, be glad. I think yours are a perfect size. They're not too big and not too small."

"Hey Tif? Show you mine, if you show me yours, yo." Reno smirked at their reflections in the long mirror.

Tifa gave him a slight slap on the upper arm. "Oh you!"

She looked back down to his chest. "I think you should put on a bra, though. I picked out this style for you, since you had still been flat-chested. You're kind of in danger of flashing people now."

Reno shook his head, sending his red hair flying. "Nothin' doin'! Cotton chest traps! All of 'em! I'll let'em fly free. If someone gets a look, good for them. 'Cause that's all they're getting, yo!"

Beginning to place his hair into its customary ponytail, Tifa stopped Reno's hands. "No! Leave it loose. Cloud likes loose, long hair."

Reno looked at Tifa in the mirror. "Tifa, uh, thanks for ya help, yo."

Smiling back at the frightened gaze in the mirror, Tifa gave Reno a small hug around the shoulders. "Thank me later by letting me baby-sit the beautiful babies you're going to have."

Reno's face transformed with a blush and a small smile. "Yeah, babies gotta be beautiful. Me and Strife, ain't no stopping the pretty, yo."

Reno's gaze darted over to Tifa with a rare look of uncertainty. "Tifa, ya really think I gotta shot?"

Tifa tightened her hug around his arms. "Cloud always stares at you when you come in. When you're at the bar, we have this little alcove where a person can see you but you can't see them. Cloud gazes at you with the prettiest smile on his face right up until you leave.

Ocean-blue eyes tearing up, Reno emitted a loud sniff. "Aw fuck, Tif. If I hadda known, I'd of flashed him more, yo."

Laughing, Tifa began to brush out the long, red hair. "You did enough. Trust me."

Reno stood still, not knowing what to do with his hands, since Tifa made him leave the Electro-Mag rod downstairs with Rude. "So Tifa, it true Cloud's hung like a horse?"

Playing with Reno's hair, Tifa giggled and hid her face in his hair.

"Come on, Tifa! Spill it! Gotta know, before I see the one-eyed snake and run away screamin', yo."

Peeking through Reno's hair, her brown eyes filled with mirth, Tifa gave a slow nod, before going into another fit of giggles.

Giving his reflection a firm nod, Reno tilted his head in deep thought. "Must be that mountain air, yo."

Tifa couldn't reply because she had collapsed, guffawing, onto the floor.

XXX

Sitting on Marlene's bed, Reno clenched and unclenched his hands in his lap, waiting for Tifa to give him the signal to come down. He had acted all confident, in front of Rude, who remained adamant he change his mind about Cloud Strife.

Truth be told, Reno had put all his eggs into one basket. Having asked his Grandma, up in the Lifestream, to find a daddy for his babies, she had come up with Cloud Strife.

If Cloud flat out said no, and Reno couldn't sway him, he would be lost. Sure, he had other fish in the sea, but he wanted Cloud Strife and no one else.

Peeking into the doorway, Tifa motioned to him. "He's downstairs talking to Rude. Come on."

Taking a deep breath, Reno stood up. Giving himself another glance in the mirror, he smoothed down the front of his sun dress and followed Tifa downstairs.

Having finished his conversation with Cloud, Rude started on another glass of beer. Giving a nod, to Tifa and Reno, he moved to the other end of the bar.

Looking down, Cloud stared glumly into his half-empty glass.

Tifa walked over to Rude, while Reno snuck up to Cloud on his blind side. "Hey, Cloud. Long time no see, yo."

Glancing up into the bar mirror, Cloud saw Reno for the first time. He turned around slowly on the bar stool.

With glowing eyes the size of saucers, Cloud's shocked gaze moved up-and-down Reno's new form.

Fidgeting, Reno shifted his weight from sandaled foot to sandaled foot. "Cloud?"

A hero of the world twice-over, Cloud Strife, the one choice to be Reno's life-partner and father of his future babies, began to snicker. He then exploded into full-out laughter while pointing at Reno's face. "AHHH! Oh Gods, Reno! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You look ridiculous! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Reno lived the life of a veteran Turk, previous to that a street rat. For him, disappointment and pain had been friends for a long time.

Putting on the smirking face, that had saved his pride countless times, Reno moved into his customary slouch. "Che! Yeah, Strife. Couldn't fool you, yo."

Reno didn't think Cloud even heard him. The blond laughed so hard.

Turning around, Reno slouched out the front door.

Feeling the harsh sunlight against his pale skin, Reno ran to Rude's car. Jerking the back door open with a curse, he flung himself face-down onto the back seat, and slammed the door behind him. Curling himself up into a ball, he hid his face in his hair, and began to cry.

XXX

Standing at the bar in utter shock, Rude stared at a laughing Cloud Strife. He looked down to Tifa, who looked back up to him.

The couple nodded to each other, then Rude ran out after Reno.

Rude's frantic gaze looked up and down the street, seeing no sign of the wild Turk. Closing shaded eyes, the man concentrated, relying on the sixth sense that had always helped him find Reno. No matter how well his partner hid.

Reopening his eyes, Rude walked to his car. Opening the door, he slumped into the driver's seat. Glancing up into the driver's front mirror, he spied his ravishingly beautiful partner crying his heart out in the backseat. "Where to, Partner?"

Reno covered his tear-smudged face with long, white fingers. "Take me home, Rude. Ain't nothin' for me here no more. Take me home, yo."

With a firm nod, Rude started the car and drove away.

XXX

Apoplectic, Tifa walked around the bar towards her childhood friend. When she got within a leg's width of his snickering form, she released a head-kick that sent him flying into the far wall.

"Tifa! What the fuck?" Cloud held the side of his head.

"I always stand up for you, Cloud Strife, even when you're being a pig-headed asshole! But this does it! Gods! Rude was right! You are nothing but a selfish, dumb airhead!"

"Tifa, what the hell are you talking about?

Tifa crossed her arms under her chest. "What you did to Reno!"

Cloud looked away, while rubbing his head, and started to laugh again.

Gloved hands balled into dangerous fists. Tifa gave him another hard kick.

"Owww! What! What did I do that was so wrong? He tried to play a joke on me and I caught him!"

Sighing, Tifa once again asked herself what she ever saw in Cloud. "Cloud, have you heard of the New Shinra Equal Opportunity Program?"

Cloud's forehead furrowed, signifying the attempted use of his brain. "Yeah…, it's uh Rufus Shinra's new charity project. You volunteer to get Mako treatments and the Mako gives you girly parts so you can…"

Counting back from one hundred, Tifa stared down at Cloud's blond head. She could hear the wheels in Cloud's head go clickity-clack.

"Oh, shit," Cloud stared wide-eyed up at Tifa, with his trademark little boy save-my-ass-I've-fucked-up look. "He chose me to-?"

"Hard to believe, but yeah."

Dropping his head back down, Cloud placed his elbows on bent knees. "I screwed up again. Didn't I?"

Once again pulling Cloud's ass out of the fire, Tifa bent down and ruffled Cloud's hair. "I'll call Rude and find out where he took Reno. Then you go and beg on your knees for him to forgive you. Maybe he'll consider putting you back on his short list for potential daddies."

Cloud clutched his miserable head with his hands. "Reno's going to kill me."

Tifa nodded. "Sure he will, but try to have the babies first. I've already been promised baby-sitting time."

XXX

Cloud met Rude, who was standing outside Reno's apartment complex.

Tifa had given Cloud the directions, but she didn't really need to.

Cloud had kind of been following Reno around, when he wasn't busy making deliveries, for almost three years now. He didn't consider what he did stalking more like an unusual hobby. This way he could justify his actions when the planets aligned and he thought like a sane person.

Reno had come under Cloud's notice with the whole Sephiroth mess.

However, Cloud's curiosity did not turn into a full-blown obsession until the "unfortunate Remnants fiasco".

Reno being the only one, to Cloud's knowledge, who acted like Reno. This fascinated him endlessly.

For all the parties involved, Reno's falling in love with Cloud turned out to be a good thing. Since Cloud's 'fascination' had gotten to the point where criminal charges should have been handed down. Of course, the charges would never stick. Cloud was the world's hero.

While indulging in his chosen 'hobby' of Reno stalking, Cloud had wondered why the Turk kept visiting a new building for the last three months. If he had truly been a stalker, the mercenary/delivery boy would have broken into the place to find out. However, the hero further deluded himself into thinking a true hobbyist would never stoop to breaking-and-entering .

Once Cloud found out the mysterious buildinh housed the NSEOP science labs and medical facilities, everything fell into place.

Glaring straight out into traffic, Rude refused to dignify Cloud's presence with even a glance. "Don't know what Reno sees in you. Don't care. All I know is I've seen him after he'd been tortured, after he'd been shot three times, and after he heard his Grandma died. The man never cried once. At this moment, since you acted like the dumb-fuck everyone acknowledges you to be, my partner's crying his eyes out. Fix it."

Cloud hung his shamed head and nodded.

With a nod in return, Rude walked to his car. He didn't bother telling Cloud Reno's apartment number, because the whole Turk division, except for Reno, knew about Cloud's chosen 'hobby.'

When he found out, Tseng figured if the stalking kept Cloud from running amok like Sephiroth, so be it.

Reno may be the sacrificial Turk lamb handed to the psycho Lone Wolf, but Tseng had a long history with Reno.

To be frank, Tseng decided the little shit deserved whatever the fates threw at his skinny ass.

XXX

Cloud stood in front of Reno's door for a long time before he bolstered up the nerve to knock.

"For fuck's sake, Rude! I told ya I'd be fine, yo!" Reno flung the door open. Tear-filled eyes widened in shock, seeing Cloud, with arm raised to knock on the door again.

While Reno's upper lip curled back into a snarl, Cloud finally saw him like everyone else now saw him. Beautiful, so beautiful. To think, he almost lost this because of his own stupidity. Well, he now had the chance to fix things and fix them he would. In spite of Reno, rushing to slam the door in his face. "Ain't buyin' nothin' what ya sellin', Strife!"

Blocking the door with his boot, Cloud shoved the door back with a firm arm. Mako eyes shining stone cold with determination.

Flying backwards from the shove, Reno recovered with a back-tumble. The roll brought him to the couch, where underneath he kept a spare Electro-Mag rod.

The Turk turned towards Cloud, in full battle crouch, itching for a fight.

Cloud had left his sword in Fenrir, believing he didn't need it. He still believed he didn't need it. Cloud had fought Reno before. He knew all the Turk's moves. He would do fine, in a hand-to-hand fight.

Looking for a weak point, the Planet's Chosen flexed his body, readying to launch himself at Reno.

When Reno, purely by accident, found a major weak point of Cloud's.

XXX

Everyone told Reno to wear a bra.

Hating the 'cotton chest trap' at first sight, the Wild Turk refused. Looking now, at Cloud's stunned face staring at his chest, Reno realized he should have put on the bra.

Tifa had been right about Reno flashing people with his boobs. She told him if he stood up straight in the dress he would be fine.

Of course, overcome with righteous rage, Reno had forgotten.

By crouching down to fight, Reno had given Cloud a full view of his 'twins.'

Attempting to recover, the blushing Turk brought his arms up to cover his chest, but the save came too late.

Cloud had seen nipple. Two pretty pink nipples, to be exact, and they would not to be taken away from him now.

Reno didn't even see Cloud move.

Cloud stood near the door.

Reno brought his arms down to wrap over his breasts. Instead, he found himself holding an armful of Cloud, who's mouth currently sucked on one nipple.

Reno wasn't a girl. The extra reproductive organs housed in his thin frame disputed the assertation. However, he also still had a penis and a full set of balls. He considered himself a man. A man who could get pregnant, and give birth, but still a man.

To his everlasting regret, at this moment, Reno acted like a total girl. Releasing a high scream, he smacked Cloud over the head and shoulders with his Electro-Mag rod using both hands. The weapon proved as ineffective as a fly-swatter. "Get off! Get off! Babies only, yo!

Halting his suckling for the moment, Cloud tore the rod from Reno's white-knuckled grip and tossed the weapon onto the floor. He then rested his head between Reno's breasts. "Well then, let's make a baby."

Shoving at Cloud's shoulders, Reno slapped the sides of his spiky head. "Fuck off and get out, Strife! Ya had ya chance! Closest ya gonna get to my babies is seein' them in the street! Gonna get 'em a great daddy, who don't laugh at mommy, and make her feel bad, yo!"

Tightening his hold around Reno's waist, Cloud breathed in his love's sweet smell. "Not going to happen."

"The fuck? Don't get all loony on me, Strife! I'm decidin' who I'm havin' my babies with. And it ain't gonna be you! Never ever, yo!"

Deeply inhaling Reno's scent again, Cloud tightened his hold even further.

Reno stopped flailing and rested his hands on Cloud's shoulders. "Cloud, ya gotta let go. Gonna break my ribs, yo."

"You're ovulating."

"The hell? How the fuck do you know, yo?" With a pout, Reno thumped his fists on Cloud's shoulders.

"I can smell you. Enhanced. Remember?"

Reno raised one arm to sniff an armpit. "Sayin' I stink now, Strife?"

Giving a soft laugh, Cloud rubbed his face against Reno's chest. "No. I'm saying you smell good. Really good. In fact, I think I'm going to eat you."

On that note, Cloud resumed his nipple worship.

Reno relaxed his body and bided his time.

When he felt Cloud's iron hold loosen, Reno disappeared in a flash.

Since Cloud blocked the front door, Reno ran to his bedroom, slamming and locking the door behind him. Crouching down, with his back against the locked door, he wrapped his arms around himself and began to rock back and forth.

What could he do? Reno wanted a baby so bad. Cloud stood ready and willing to make one with him. However, a Turk had pride. Cloud, in his thoughtlessness, had wounded Reno's severely.

Covering his face with his hands, Reno continued to rock.

"Reno? Reno, let me in. I promise I won't attack you. Let me give you what we both want."

Reno stopped rocking. Heaving a deep, thoughtful sigh, he rested the back of his head against the door. "Cloud? Everybody's right. You're fucked up nuts. Get out. I don't want someone like you near my babies. I'll have 'em with somebody else. Someone'll treat me and my babies good, yo."

Reno felt and heard a huge thump. The door splintered against his back. Jumping up, he backed away from the door.

The Turk resumed his fighting stance. He didn't care if his chest showed. He wouldn't be going down without a fight.

XXX

Under Cloud's enraged onslaught, the door gave way like paper. The madman stood framed by the destroyed doorway. Hands fisted with a face of stone.

Gazing into Cloud's fiery eyes, Reno found no mercy.

Walking forward, with a resolute step, Cloud stopped right in front of a snarling Reno. "Reno? Listen good. I'd try to be gentle and reasonable, but that never seems to work with you. So I'm going tell you the score, seeing you're a Turk. The only person getting between your legs and giving you babies is me. Try to fuck around on me with anyone else and they're dead. I'll carve them up, piece by piece, and make you watch."

"You try to run with my babies? I'll hunt you down, bring you back, and make you have another baby with me. The Turks will even help me. You know why? I'm the only hero this world has and everybody knows it. For years, Shinra wanted me to have babies. I'm not going to have babies with anyone else but you. So get used to me, because I'm not going anywhere, except into your bed."

Reno stood, frozen, with shock. Eyes wide with fear. Tifa warned him. Rude bent over backwards, trying to get him to change his mind. He should have listened.

Cloud Strife was fucking crazy, with the pull, to back up everything he said.

When push came to shove, Reno could scream to the rooftops, he didn't want this. The plea would fall on deaf ears.

Reno acknowledged what Cloud said about Shinra had been all true. Heck, he even read all the paperwork himself. The research, the tests, all the hypotheses studying the rife potential of Cloud's Strife's children. The New Shinra scientists had been devastated when Intel discovered his homosexual tendencies. How could he have forgotten?

By going through the NSEOP program and letting Cloud know of his love, Reno had essentially built his own cage.

However, Cloud had been correct about another thing.

Reno was a Turk, through and through. In spite of the heart-stopping terror, he felt appreciation for being told straight up how things would be.

Once a Turk, always a Turk. Once a street rat, always a street rat.

Having been given all the information, Reno just had to figure out the best way to play the situation to his advantage. He wanted a baby. Strife wanted to give him one. He loved Cloud. He now knew Cloud to be a possessive man psychotic enough, to the point of committing murder, to keep him close.

If he lived a normal life, Reno would have been jumping out the window to get away from Cloud. But he lived the Turks' way, and to be a Turk, the last thing you could be was normal.

After Reno looked away from Cloud's eyes, he thought everything through. For a Turk relationship, their marriage would actually be pretty tame.

Reno always thought fast once he had all the pertinent details. A Turk had to be to survive. He juggled the pros and cons. Nodding to himself, he made up his mind.

XXX

With his focus back, Reno straightened up and directed his gaze into Cloud's eyes. His resolution must have shown on his face, because Cloud backed off a little with uncertainty.

Cloud had seen this feral, predatory look once. Right before Reno brought the plate down on Sector 7.

Shining a little smile, Reno tilted his head. "Aww Strife, big speech and all. Runnin' from little Reno, yo?"

Shrugging pale shoulders, the top of Reno's sun dress came down. Deftly catching the top with his hands, the wily Turk lovingly cupped his breasts. Beautiful, long, red hair cascaded all around him.

Gulping at the ravishing sight, Cloud's eyes widened.

Glancing down at his chest, Reno's kittenish smile became wider. "Like these? Don't blame you. Soon as they popped out, I was touchin' em all the time, yo."

Swaying closer, Reno's hands, cupped over his breasts, brushed Cloud's trembling chest.

Cloud made a choking sound.

Reno wrinkled his forehead in thought. "Nah. If it was the boobs, you'd of gone for Tifa, gay or no."

"Maybe…" Dropping his hands, so the top completed its fall, Reno cupped his naked breasts with long, slim fingers. "It's my pretty pink nipples ya like, hmm? Kinda cold. Wanna warm 'em up for me, yo?"

When the top of Reno's dress fell, Cloud's eyes became riveted to the sight.

Lowering his head to the nearest breast, the hero pulled a willing Reno against his strong body. "Yeah, Reno. I'll warm them for you."

Cloud's lips fastened around a pert nipple. With his proud head lowered, he missed the triumphant look glowing in Reno's eyes.

In his mind, Reno started to laugh like a hyena. Big man, Cloud, hero of the world, filled with enhancements and super powers, brought low by a pair of nipples.

Reno sniggered, not feeling scared anymore, for himself, or his future Strife babies.

Cloud could talk all the big talk he wanted to, while waving his big sword in Reno's face.

However, with the realization of how much control he held over Cloud, the Turk Second-In-Command knew exactly how to take full advantage of this wondrous power.

Now he felt more comfortable, Reno decided to enjoy himself and see if Tifa had told him the truth.

Gently drawing himself away from Cloud, Reno walked towards the bed, unzipping the zipper on the back of the dress. Allowing the dress to fall, he then climbed onto the bed.

Laying down, Reno raised his arms over his head and did a full-body stretch. "Hey, Cloud. Watcha still doin' over there? Thought we're gonna make a baby, yo?"

Reno had never seen someone tear out of his own clothes so fast. Glancing down at Cloud's crotch, he licked his lips. Yep, Tifa didn't lie. Good, old mountain air. He wasn't sure how it would all fit, but the Doc said he'd stretch. Although, seeing Cloud's penis get even bigger, he didn't think his insides worked like rubber.

Sitting down on the bed, Cloud leaned over Reno's body to take off his panties.

Earlier, Reno thought the notion silly that Tifa got matching panties to go with the dress. He changed his mind once he viewed Cloud's appreciation.

Cloud moved up Reno's body until the two lay face-to-face.

For the first time, the couple kissed. From then on, the lovemaking became a mad frenzy to the finish line.

The pair couldn't stop kissing. Tongues battling for dominance.

Reno ran questing hands up-and-down Cloud's perfect body. He couldn't believe all this enhanced power would be under his control for however long he lived. In his mind, he giggled again.

Cloud moved his hand down to pump Reno's erection.

Reno grabbed hold of the hand. "Nuh uh, Cloud. If you touch it, I'll shoot. I'm ready now. Put it in, yo!"

Frowning, Cloud pulled his hand away from Reno's grasp. "I have to check if you're ready. This is your first time with that entrance. Isn't it?"

Looking perturbed, Reno stilled his caresses on Cloud's body. "Oh yeah. Didn't think about that, yo."

Cloud began to kiss Reno again so he wouldn't notice what his hand did. Moving his hand past Reno's penis to the new female opening, he placed one finger in and checked for a membrane. He could feel Reno's vaginal muscles clutching around his finger.

Reno had already gotten wet enough for penetration. With Cloud's probing, lithe hips began to move on their own.

Reno pushed Cloud back with a disturbed look in his eyes. "Watcha doin' Cloud? Searchin' for gold?

"You could say that." Cloud smiled a little when his finger brushed against the barrier. Eureka!

Checking to see how stretched Reno had become, Cloud frowned. He could barely get a second finger inside. "Reno, I'll try to stretch you out. I'm not gonna lie, it's going to hurt."

"Really, Mr. Horse? Tell me something I don't know, yo!"

Cloud laughed, while attempting to stretch Reno out. His tongue darted out to lick pert nipples.

Reno's hips continued to move, back and forth, faster and faster. He unconsciously tightened his thighs around Cloud's hand. "Cloud, get goin' already! I read all about this in the pamphlet, yo!

Cloud's hand became soaking wet with Reno's juices. "Pamphlet?"

"Yep! Your New Body and You! Sucker came with all these pictures of how to play with my new parts, yo."

Cloud chuckled. "So you say you've been masturbating?"

"Don't everybody? Just got more parts to play with, yo!"

Nodding to himself, Cloud moved his hand away and got in position to enter Reno.

Reno held him close.

Staring into Reno's eyes, Cloud started to penetrate. His body halted when he felt the membrane. Taking a deep breath in, he then pushed all the way through.

Reno's scream echoed throughout the room.

Cloud reared back in a panic. "Reno! You okay?'

Reno glared up at him like he was retarded. "Fuck no! 'Course I ain't okay! Start movin,' so I can start feelin' good, yo!"

Fixing a determined look onto his face, Cloud began to piston in-and-out. The pace quickened by the moment.

Reno's hand masturbated below. "Aw fuck, Cloud! Tearin' me apart! Feelin' so good, yo!"

Falling back on his knees, Cloud lifted Reno's thighs up, so all of Reno's writhing figure could be viewed.

Reno had flung his right arm back above his head. Hand pressed flat against the wall for support. His other hand rubbed hard on the little bundle of nerves that came with his new female entrance."Ah! Ah! Deeper, Cloud, deeper! Ungh! Fuck! So big! Hurtin'! Unh! Deeper! Ah! Comin'! Ah! Ah! Comin'! Ah! Ah! Gah! Ahhhh! "

Flinging his left arm over his head, Reno pushed back against the wall with both hands. The fluid pulsed out onto his stomach in little spurts. Eyes clenched tight.

With eyebrows furrowed in concentration, Reno tightened his vaginal muscles around Cloud's thrusting penis. The ripples coaxing Cloud's semen out to where it belonged.

Cloud screamed when he came. Reno tightening like a vice around him.

Pushing hips flush against Reno's pelvis, Cloud lay still. His member shooting jets and jets into Reno.

Reno relaxed, with a serene smile, feeling the hot semen make its way towards his ready womb.

XXX

"Mommy! Guess where babies come from?"

Reno bent down to be glomped by his oldest baby chick. He made sure to adjust the hold around the year-old baby in his arms. "Don't know, Zackie. Where do babies come from, yo?"

"Auntie Tifa said her baby was delivered by the stork!"

Straightening up, Reno looked over to Tifa.

Walking from the back room, the expectant mother held the hand of his second baby chick, and Grandma's namesake, Katie.

"Stork, huh? Reno quirked an eyebrow with a smirk. "Yeah, my stork makes deliveries, and then he comes home to-."

"Reno!" Tifa waved her hands in front of her chest and pregnant belly. "Let it be!"

Sitting down to rest, Reno readjusted the baby against his hip. Damn! Baby Aerith seemed heavier than a sack of potatoes when she fell asleep.

Katie toddled up to crawl onto Reno's lap. Helping her up, he hugged her close and kissed the top of her chocobo blonde head.

With a weary eye, Reno glanced around at all his babies surrounding him. Baby chocobos all. If he hadn't held them in his body for nine months, and seen them come out between his own two legs, he'd question himself whether he was the mommy.

Reno shrugged. Strife's genes came through so strong, he guessed his genetics didn't stand a chance in the battle for supremacy.

Reno held his babies closer against his body. "Hey Zackie! C'mere, yo!

With a big smile, Zack, who had gone back to practicing with his New Shinra-issued practice sword ran over to his Mommy. Mommy always had good news when he smiled like that.

"Guess who's comin' in eight months, yo!"

Furrowing his eyebrows, Zack frowned and thought hard. "New baby chick?"

Reno's smirk encompassed his whole face. Gods, Zack looked just like Cloud when he tried to use his brain. "Got it, Zackie! Brain's workin' good today, yo!"

Jumping up and down in circles, Zack whooped. He then looked back to Reno. Eyes filled with glee. "Did the stork deliver the new baby like Tifa's, Mommy?"

Leaning back, Reno shook his head. "Nuh uh. Mommy had something better, yo!"

Zack clapped his hands. "What, Mommy? What was it?"

"Remember when Katie got sick. Her head got really hot and Mommy stayed up all night with her?"

Zack stopped jumping with a frown. "Yeah, you were sad, Mommy."

"Well, when Katie got better, and Mommy could finally collapse, Mommy got a prize! Mommy got visited by the baby fairy, yo!"

"Baby fairy?"

"Yep. The fairy came, while Mommy lay passed out, and gave Mommy a baby!"

"Wow!" Zack looked toward the open front doorway. "Hey Daddy! Guess what? Mommy got visited again by the baby fairy!"

Reno felt a kiss on the top of his head."Hey Zackie! Go see if Auntie Tifa has some more of them cookies, yo!'

Zack ran off towards the kitchen.

Cloud bent down to kiss the heads of his other babies asleep on Reno's lap. He then sat down on the chair next to Reno's and gifted him with a severe Mako-blue stare. "Baby fairy?"

"Yeah. Funny what happens when I'm unconscious, yo."

Cloud attempted to give off a semblance of guilt, but couldn't pull off the emotion very well. "You left your nightshirt open again."

"I was up all night takin' care of Katie, who had the fever, and just finished breastfeedin' Aerith. Wasn't thinkin', just collapsed. Didn't think I'd be visited by the baby fairy, yo!

"So I'm the baby fairy now."

Looking his husband, up-and-down, Reno smiled the meanest smile Cloud ever saw. "Nah, you're Cloud Strife, hero of the world, stalker nipple freak, yo!"


End file.
